AT A SPIRAL
“During a spiral meditation performed with the transcendent aspect of Shiva , I had the following experiences:
During the first part the meditation was normal. I was experiencing quite a deep state of void. At a certain point, after approximately 10 minutes after the meditation started, I began to fell in the heart area a very intense emotion, as I have never felt before, in my entire life.
This emotion grew in intensity so quickly, that I thought my heart would explode and I would die. This state lasted for several minutes, after which I was absorbed into a black “light”, in a state of balance and harmony.
I felt a colossal force, practically infinite and I felt as if I could comprise everything inside of me.
I felt that my entire body was disintegrating, every cell of my body was going in a completely different direction, as if I was “spread” in the entire Universe. Although I was experiencing a deep state of tranquility, my whole being was tensed at its maximum.
At a certain point I became aware of the fact that I have lost the notions left-right, up, down. I thought I would fall. I opened my eyes and I was consternated because I could not see anything.
In front of my eyes, all was black, with no difference whether my eyes were open or close. I closed my eyes again and I focused intensely in Ajna Chakra , in order to overcome my fear of falling down.
I had noticed from my previous experiences that I could go beyond any perturbing states through focus in Ajna chakra. After several seconds, I entered a deeper state, in which was clear the image of a vortex (“black hole” in which everything was absorbed).
From time to time, rays of white light would appear, and they were “swallowed” by the vortex. The intensity of my experience was reaching almost unbearable heights! I sat down, leaving the spiral.
After this, the intensity of what I had been feeling decreased. After several minutes, my sight recovered. My experience could not have lasted more than several minutes, yet the depth to which I reached was by far the greatest I had ever experienced in my entire life.
After the experience I described above, the intensity and depth of all my inner experiences grew, and I felt as if that spiral meditation marked a crucial moment in my inner development.” (Dan Oros, Simleul Silvaniei)
“I was in the Herculane yoga camp and it had only been a day since we arrived. It was a beautiful and green spring morning. I was feeling great, and my lover was with me in the room.
I was brushing my hair, wishing to be beautiful for him. Suddenly, my body became tense as a bow, I sat on the bed and the tears begun to shed. My heart was so filled with beauty and love that my heart seemed to burst and instinctively my back arched and a white bright light came out of my chest.
I felt it as a white laser piercing the matter and going into the infinite. I did not dare to put my hands on the chest. I felt I would burn them. Moreover, I did not want to stop it from coming out of my chest.
I was crying with my eyes closed, my back arched, my arms lying next to me. The light came out of me, going into the infinite, and purifying everything in its path.
I usually do not make visualizations while I meditate. However, this time I actually felt and saw a large lily with pulpy petals blooming in my heart. I was light. I understood at that moment Abhinavagupta ‘s verse “I light everything with my own radiance”.
Now I know the reality of this experience he was talking about. This state lasted for about an hour and then occurred for several days in a row, daity, just as intense, as overwhelming and as bright.
I could see the world with different eyes. Apparently, in my contact with the people and the situations I was the same person.
Back in Bucharest, I told Grieg about my experience. I told him I saw the light in me. He said: “it was a divine necessity.”
I thought about these words for weeks, being unable to understand why he had told me it was a necessity when I felt it was a manifestation of the divine grace.
One night, I dreamt I was with my master and that I asked him again the same question. He said: The fact that you have hands, feet, that you are whole, is this not a grace? Your state was a necessity. It means that you are mature enough, you have sufficient knowledge and enough experience. Now you can move on…
I woke up happy that I dreamt him and that I finally understood the mystery of his saying. Now I know what I have to do next. I saw the light in my heart and I was reborn from it.” (Rat Rodica, Oradea)